Feeling blue..

If you get tired

I feel a little bit overwhelmed and under appreciated today.  I’m feeling blue.

The realistic side of my brain knows this is not actually the case, because for the most part I know that my bosses are pleased with my work, and perhaps that is part of the problem, they are so pleased they want me to do everything.

If you asked me to describe myself I would say I was conscientious, probably bordering on excessively orderly where my work is concerned. I’m loyal and I am definitely 100% a geek. I’ve been told I’m a do-er and this is one of the reasons why people walk past others and come straight to me.

I like being needed and helpful, I always seem to thrive better when I have a task. But now the weight of other peoples expectations is starting to drag me down.

Is it ok to just stand up and say that enough is enough, I infer it, but I can never seem to find my words. I know they hear me when I talk, but do they actually listen, because it never seems to sink in.

I feel like screaming sometimes, or crying, but at my age hiding under the desk should not even be considered.

I had counselling to sort this, they referred me, so why is it they often times ignore the signs that are so blatantly obvious.

I’m resilient but I am worried that one of these days I am going to crack under the pressure.

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